📱
Professional TikTok User
Has successfully opened the app thousands of times without supervision.
Needed a job
Reasonable start.
URGENT EMPLOYMENT REQUEST
HE SPENT
HIS LAST £500
ON A BILLBOARD.
At this point, giving him a job is basically charity.
Please do not press reject. He has been through enough.
CV: PENDING
DESPERATION: 100%
JOB WANTED • JOB WANTED • JOB WANTED • JOB WANTED • WILL WORK FOR
MONEY • PROBABLY • JOB WANTED •
OFFICIAL QUALIFICATIONS
Why should you hire Deniz?
🗣️
Can Talk
Arguably too much. Ideal for meetings that should have been emails.
💸
Financial Decision Making
Spent his last £500 on a billboard asking for employment.
🧠
Problem Solving
Problem: no job. Solution: billboard. Next problem: still no job.
⏰
Availability
Very available. Suspiciously available. Can start yesterday.
🤝
Team Player
Will join literally any team that has payroll.
EMPLOYMENT HISTORY
A highly decorated career.
PHASE 1
PHASE 2
Got a job
Historic scenes. Economists were shocked.
PHASE 3
Got fired
We are still gathering evidence.
PHASE 4
Bought billboard
LinkedIn was apparently not enough.
CURRENT
Back to square one
Which brings us to you, dear employer.
*Timeline is presented as a joke, Deniz is an asset in the workplace
£500
spent on billboard
0
confirmed jobs from this website
∞
applications left
REFERENCES
What people are saying
“Please just employ him so he stops talking about it.”
“We can confirm he does know what a job is.”
“His greatest weakness is unemployment.”
FINAL CALL
Do the right thing.
One click could change Deniz's life. Or at least his LinkedIn status.